How to Choose the Right Counsellor
Looking for a counsellor can feel strangely overwhelming.
You open a directory and suddenly there are 57 smiling headshots, lots of acronyms, and words like integrative, person-centred, psychodynamic…
…and somehow you’re supposed to pick one human to talk about your life with. (Kind of a wild concept if you really think about it.)
No pressure.
If you’re feeling unsure about how to choose, or how to know who’r right for you - that’s completely normal.
I’ve put together a few things to think about when looking for a counsellor - not a checklist, just a few gentle suggestions!
The most important thing (by far): how you feel
This might surprise you, but the biggest predictor of good therapy isn’t the technique or the fancy training.
It’s the relationship (there’s actually so much research on this, it’s wild!).
Do you feel:
safe?
listened to?
not judged?
like you don’t have to perform or explain yourself perfectly?
That feeling of “they get me” and truly feeling heard - that’s the stuff that really helps.
You could have the most qualified therapist in the world, but if you feel tense or guarded with them, it’s going to be hard to open up.
Comfort matters more than credentials.
Always.
Yes, qualifications are important (just don’t get lost in the acronyms)
You don’t need to decode every letter after someone’s name.
Just check they’re:
properly trained
registered with a professional body
working ethically and safely
That’s enough.
After that, it’s much more about the human than the paperwork.
Side note - if you don’t understand the qualifications (eg. what is even is transactional analysis, or person-centred) your counsellor is probably a HUGE counselling nerd (I know I am) and would love to tell you - you can always ask!
It can help to find someone who “gets” what you’re bringing
Some counsellors work a lot with grief.
Some with trauma.
Some with anxiety or relationships or big life changes.
You definitely don’t need an exact match, but it can feel really comforting to sit with someone who already understands the shape of what you’re going through.
It often means you don’t have to start from scratch explaining everything.
You can just… start.
Pay attention to their vibe
Have a read of their website or socials.
Do you like how they talk?
Do you feel calmer reading it?
Do they sound like a real person?
Some therapists are more clinical and structured.
Some are more conversational and relaxed.
Neither is better.
It’s just about what feels right for you.
Therapy shouldn’t feel like a job interview.
It should feel like a safe conversation.
And you’re allowed to change your mind
This one’s big.
You’re not signing a lifetime contract.
It’s completely okay to:
try one session (When I’ve looked for counsellors, I always have a 3 session rule - if we’re not vibing by then, I’ll look for someone else)
see how it feels
and decide it’s not quite the right fit
A good counsellor won’t be offended.
Honestly, we want you to find the right person - even if that isn’t us.
A gentle reminder
You don’t need to find the “perfect” counsellor.
You’re just looking for someone who feels safe, warm, and human.
That’s where the real work happens.
If you’re thinking about starting counselling and want to ask a few questions first, you’re always welcome to get in touch for a chat.
